BROKEN WINGS (m. yanderes x reader)

XVII- afraid

A/N:

Hey everyone!

Things are finally picking up! But before reading this chapter I just want to throw a small warning: this chapter is very heavy and has mentions of mental health, sexual assault/rape, so if you don't feel comfortable with any of these please proceed with cautions.

I want to throw in a small message for victims as well, something along the lines of what I would have liked to hear when this happened to me: Whatever happened to you is not your fault. And just because you haven't told anyone about it or because people didn't believe you does not mean your feelings are not valid or that what that person did to you was okay. Blaming the victim or doubting their tale is NEVER okay. So just know that I believe you and you have nothing to feel guilty or bad about. Whatever were the circumstances.

That said, I hope you enjoy it! 

(Y/n) hadn't shown up to class this morning. She couldn't.

She felt disgusting. Gross. And all too anxious to get out of her bedroom.

Hell, she hadn't even stepped out of her room. And if it hadn't been for Julian's thoughtful gesture of leaving a glass of water with fresh lemon and a plate of food for her on her bedside table, (Y/n) would have probably spent the whole day hungover and hungry.

Not that she was particularly hungry though.

She was too anxious for that.

Not because of her pounding headache and raging hangover, or because she had been so drunk that Julian had had to bring her home and leave Stella behind. Though these certainly didn't make her feel better about herself. She'd definitely have to apologise to her friends when she saw them.

But her being drunk in front of her new friends and making a mess of herself didn't come close to the nagging thoughts that plagued her mind about Simon.

(Y/n) had been drunk last night.

So she knew it was very possible for her to have mistaken a random boy for Simon, even more so considering how hyperaware and out of it she had been lately.

Still, she couldn't shake off the feeling that it had been him. And just the thought of him being anywhere near her made her stomach clench and bile rise up her throat, made her sick at her core and terrified beyond belief.

(Y/n) buried her head in her knees, hugging them close to her chest as she rocked back and forth on her bed.

Usually she'd try to remind herself of the fact that he was far away from her, and that he would have had no reason to move to her current city. But at this moment that just wasn't working. There was nothing she could do to shake off the tension and anxiety building up inside of her.

What if he was indeed here? What if he had followed her to make her life even more of a nightmare than he already had? What if he wasn't done with her or worse, what if he resented her for talking about what he had done to her.

Not that anyone had believed her when she had though.

Hell, her own father had turned his back on her and treated her like she was a filthy liar. Like she was the one at fault.

"Please... (Y/n), you know Simon. He would never hurt you, you're like a sister to him."

The only person who had believed her was her mother. Her mother had done everything in her power to help her, from letting (Y/n) sleep with her to accompanying her to the police station and her first psychiatrist appointment.