Only to Feel This Fully [Completed]

Afterword

Thank you so much for reading this. I wrote this whole thing in the span of about a week a few months ago when I was in a weird place. The reaction thus far has been immensely gratifying, so thank you to everyone who has read this, voted, or commented.

The sequel, "Coming Home," which starts about eight months after Chapter 25, is currently in progress, so go check it out! I promise there'll be regular updates.

Only To Feel This Fully tried to deal with themes such as identity, group pressures, first love, alienation, mental health, and coming-of-age. I hope I did that justice and the sequel will attempt to deal with similar themes, but also more. Charlie, my protagonist, was left in a very bad place at the end of Chapter 25 and, unfortunately for him, he's in an even worse position when the sequel starts. So, stay tuned and follow my page for updates.

In the meantime, I've seen some comments about the titles and they're all references to songs, poems, or something else. I thought I'd just share all of those references here below:

Chapter Titles:

1. Open Ice: a title of book about hockey I must've read when I was like twelve

2. The Way That We Used To: song by Ruel

3. Wish I Had A Better Excuse: lyric from the song Boys by Charli XCX

4. The Moon is High Like Your Friends: lyric from the song Paper Rings by Taylor Swift

5. So Many Things I Shouldn't Do: lyric from the song Blame It On Your Love by Charlie XCX ft. Lizzo

6. Golden Like Daylight: lyric from Daylight by Taylor Swift

7. Tell Me Something Good: honestly, can't find what this was from

8. Conversations with Friends: novel by Sally Rooney

9. Normal People: novel by Sally Rooney

10. Say Something: song by Chris Stapleton ft. Justin Timberlake (don't judge lol)

11. Not Thinking Bout You: song by Ruel

12. Gotta Learn to Live with Regrets: lyric from the song Regrets by Jay-Z

13. Pretty Little Fears: song by 6lack ft. J. Cole

14. We Can Make It So Divine: lyric from the song Ribs by Lorde

15. Levitating: song by Dua Lipa

16. Here In My Arms: song by Leon Bridges

17. The Difference between Love & Mercy: line from poem Devotion by Ocean Vuong

18. Make Me Feel: song by Janelle Monae

19. Look What I've Found: song by Lady Gaga

20. The Moon and the Sky: song by Sade

21. The Days: song by Patrick Wolf (from the movie God's Own Country)

22. Tuesday's Gone: song by Lynyrd Skynyrd (again, please don't judge)

23. Cruel Summer: song by Taylor Swift

24. Day Bleeds Into Nightfall: lyric from song Someone You Loved by Lewis Capaldi

25. Someone You Loved: song by Lewis Capaldi