if i love you was a promise | b.e

sixteen

we had been inside for about four hours. the boys abandoned us about an hour in to go hang out with brandon's friends. billie and i were snuggled up together on a couch by the wall, drifting off to sleep despite the blaring music in the room.

"joey." i felt billie's breath on my skin.

"yeah?"

she pressed her lips softly on mine for a minute, then said "i just want to say im really happy right now. with you."

i didn't reply for a moment. i felt a smile grow on my face and kissed her back. "so am i."

we kissed again, a long one this time. we were both too tired to realise someone could see us, we were in the moment and nothing else mattered. i didn't remember ever leaving her lips, but when i woke up, billie was resting her head on my chest and we were still on the same couch.

this time, the music was off and the room was mostly empty, apart from the odd person passed out on the floor. i didn't see the boys anywhere, so i just stayed put as i didn't know what time it was or who was still up. i wrapped my two hands around billie's waist and pulled her up closer to me, suddenly feeling unsafe in a stranger's house filled with drunk and high people. at least we were together.

about an hour passed, no one had come into the room until now. it was aidan, and he seemed to be running from something, or trying to find something. when he saw us, he ran in our direction.

"quick, get up." he said in a panic. billie groaned as her eyes had barely opened before aidan pulled her out of my arms. i immediately stood up and took her back. "what's going on?" i asked, tired and confused.

"some bad shit is going on back there that we do not want to be a part of."

"where's the others?" billie asked, starting to wake up from fright.

"they're coming. brandon was passed out so they had to get him up." he answered, just as they came into the room. they rushed over to us. "let's get out of here." eli said. i could weed off of all of them.

"were you guys smoking?" i asked as we walked out, not wanting to be intrusive but a little intimidated.

"no, that was the rest of them. then they started taking pills. too much."

i nodded, understanding why they left. billie was strolling along sheepishly, holding my hand. she was so cute when she was tired. i gave her a kiss on the forehead and pulled her in to me and kept her close as we walked about twenty minutes back to the bus.

i pulled out my phone when we arrived safely and saw it was 5:03am. billie had an interview today and she had hardly slept yet. we hurried inside and tried to sort ourselves out without waking anyone. the boys all camped out on the floor where we were sitting earlier and billie and i headed back to our bunk. again, i took off her shoes and jewelry, then snuggled up to her and went to sleep.

**
i woke up and checked my phone. it was already 1pm. i hauled myself up and saw the boys still asleep and finneas sitting on the couch. "hey." i greeted him.

"finally someone's alive." she chuckled. i filled a glass of water and sat next to him. "how late did you guys get back?" he asked. "it was more early than late." i laughed tiredly. "around 5."

finneas rolled his eyes.

"where's maggie and patrick?" i asked him.

"they were up earlier, said they wanted to try out a cafe that wasn't open after noon."

"right." i smiled. i wished my parents were still like that. still in love after years and years.

"bils interview is at 3. she should be up soon." finneas pointed out.

"should i wake her?"

"you probably should." he agreed.

i put my water on the mini table and stepped over the boys. it was a mystery how they hadn't woken up yet. they must have been really hung over.

"hey." i whispered, tucking billies hair behind her ear. she squinted as she opened her eyes. "shit, what time is it?" she groaned. "you're ok, you have two hours." i assured her.

she rolled out of bed and stumbled to the bathroom, making me giggle. "she's up, but not quite awake." i said to finneas, making him laugh.

billie padded out to us after ten minutes, half dressed, still messy haired and sockless. it was the first time i saw her without mascara in real life, and she looked beautiful.

i held my arms open to her and she took it as an invitation to flop onto me. she kissed me lightly on the cheek. "hello." she said sweetly.

we hung out for thirty minutes before the boys woke up like dominos. first eli woke up, then aidan, isaac followed, brandon last. they all looked rough, and i could tell their heads were throbbing from their facial expressions alone.

"let me make you guys some tea." billie giggled, taking all four cups from the tiny press.

the boys practically snatched the tea from her, burning their tongues as they tried to gulp it down.

i smiled just watching her be. i think everyone in the room knew how lucky they were to know her. just her pure existence was beautiful. i counted my blessings each day since this all started.

she hopped back to the couch and sat on top of me, pulling me in for a kiss. i blushed but no one saw as billies hand was on my cheek. she just leaned her forehead on mine for a while after, taking in the happiness of this moment with the sun shining in on us. i caught finneas smiling as he looked at us. i could tell that seeing billie happy made him happy.

"hey bil, mind if we vlog today?" isaac interrupted us.

billie looked at him, then at me. "what if joey gets in the shot?" she said worriedly

"ill make sure she doesn't." he replied. "promise." eli added.

billie looked at me again. she was being protective over me and i thought it was the cutest thing ever.

"it'll be ok, bil. ill make sure im nowhere near the camera." i assured her.

billie sighed. "ok, fine."

the twins shot her a smile. "but if anything happens, i swear to god ill kill you." she said seriously.

"chill, bro." isaac laughed, sitting up to get his camera.

billie tugged at my hand and gestured her head towards the bathroom. "can we talk?"

"yeah. of course." i said, concerned, and i followed her to the tiny room.

it was tight with the two of us in there. there was a toilet and a tiny shower, and no sink. billie looked up at me, slightly nervous.

"hey." i rubbed her shoulder comfortingly. "what's up?"

"i just..." she stuttered. "im not really ready for people to know about us." she said quietly, sounding embarrassed.

i smiled. "billie, look at me."

she lifted her head slowly.

"i know you're not ready. it would be a huge deal to tell the world you were with a fan, and you would be coming out on top of that. theres no way that after a couple of days we could do that. you can relax, baby."

i smile crept on to billies lips.

"we're a secret, bil. and we'll do whatever we can to make sure no one finds out until you're ready."

"until we're both ready." she smiled, taking both of my hands in hers. i kissed her forehead, making her blush.