Dead Poets Society Imagines/Preferences

Richard Cameron/Reader

I Need A Hug
Cameron's POV
tw/cw: talks about suicide (i wrote this as I listened to Flatsound) he/they pronouns are used!

It was a week after Neil died, the Poets no longer talked to me. Charlie was expelled after punching me in the nose. I thought I deserved it, but could you blame me? Knox won't look at me and Meeks won't talk to me. Todd smiles at me when we pass each other but nothing else.

I thought life wasn't worth living, none of my friends talked to me anymore, nothing was the same.

I visited the cave frequently, reminiscing on the memories of something that didn't feel real. Sometimes I would wake up and think that Neil was still alive and that Charlie was going to wake me up with his drums again. But when I opened my eyes the room was empty, no laughter and no noise.

I took it all for granted, I hate to admit that I miss Charlie, he goes to a military school in Europe now.

Two months passed since Neil's death now, the room felt colder and colder. I felt the walls closing in on me as tears fell from my eyes and onto my trousers. I couldn't help but feel empty in my chest.

It was a whole new year at Welton, that meant a new roommate. I opened the door to see a (h/c) boy unpacking his items. I set my luggage down catching his attention.

"You must be my roommate, hi I'm (Y/n)." They smiled extending a hand which I shook smiling.

"I'm Richard, you're new?" I asked and they nodded.

"Yeah I just moved from England, it's very different here in the States, a bit warmer then what I'm used to," he laughed. His smile was so bright and perfect. If only he knew who I was but I don't doubt Knox or Meeks would tell them all about me.

"You're going to love Vermont," I smiled putting my clothes in the dresser.

"Do you like it here? In Vermont?" He asked smiling also putting his clothes away.

"It's alright, I bet its nothing like London though," I laughed and he nodded his head with a smile on his face.

"Manchester is cold, I went to a boarding school in London which was a lot colder then summers in Manchester!" He laughed patting my back. "I'm going to head out, I'm going to explore."

He left out the doors, he was sure to bump into Knox or Meeks. Maybe he'll hate my guts. I looked at my dresser sadly before closing the doors. I sat on my bed looking out the windows, it was bright and beautiful outside.

I took out my textbooks setting them on my desk before deciding to do a bit of last minute homework and a bit of studying. It took me at least an hour, (Y/n) had come back already.

"I hear you had a friend... He passed last term?" He said sadly looking out the window.

"How did you know?" I asked looking at him.

"A boy named Todd told me..." He frowned finally making eye contact with me. "I found him crying near the dock on the lake."

"Oh..." I said looking away and back at my text book. I felt arms wrap around me, he laid his head on top of mine. I couldn't help but start crying, I just let it all out as he hugged me. I hadn't felt this vulnerable in such a long time.

"I'm so sorry Cameron, I really am," he whispered hugging me tighter. I continued to cry, I sobbed and I couldn't stop. I didn't want to cry, it was easier to keep things hidden.

A while after I stopped crying, not because I wasn't sad anymore but because I had no more tears.

"You feeling better?" They whispered, I shrugged. "Do you want me to bring you water?"

"No, I'll survive..." I smiled softly and he nodded sadly kneeling in front of me.

"I can tell you've been holding onto this pain for a while. My mum told me that it's always better to let go then to hold on," he smiled.

"Your mom's wise... My parents just tell me not to show it or it'll show I'm weak..." I confessed and he shook his head.

"My mum says that being able to show your sadness is the bravest thing a person can do, not feeling embarrassed or ashamed. It's a thing to aspire to do." I just loved the way they had with words.

"Your mom sounds lovely, unlike many parents of the students here at Welton, they kind of just tell us to keep it hidden and to be lawyers or doctors," I laughed.

"My mum's sorta famous in London for her poetry and best selling books. My dad died that's why she came back to Vermont with my grandparents. She wants me to have the best education but also not loose touch with the beauties the world brings." He stood up and helped me up. We walked out the dorm room in silence. He lead me outside and to the dock.

"It's beautiful," I said smiling.

"Sometimes when I'm sad or feel lonely I go to any body of water and I look at my reflection. I speak to myself and give myself advice," he laughed and looked at me.

"You want me to try that?" I asked confused and he nodded.

"You won't know if it works if you don't try," he smiled walking away from me yet still being close enough.

I stared at my reflection, I turned to look at him as he smiled.

"This is weird..." I mumbled, "Richard Cameron, your parents hate you, your friends despise you, you're all alone in a world full of people..."

I went on and on about how last year made me feel, I cried more, but after it all was over I felt refreshed.  Like as if I just lost a bag full of bricks.

"Feeling better?" They asked nearing me smiling, I nodded smiling back.

"Thank you..." I chuckled and they shrugged and shook their head.

"No need to thank me, it's step one to your journey of healing. It's not easy but I'll be by your side as you go through it," he hugged me once more as I hugged back smiling.

"Thank you, all I need was a hug. My friends stopped talking to me. They're all mad, rightfully so too, I sent a beloved teacher away, one of my friends is in Military school because of me, and another one of my friends is dead," I chuckled. But he shook his head.

"Your friends don't hate you, they're processing a loss. They're doing it in a way they feel eases them. Todd told me he just doesn't know how to approach you or the other poets. Whoever the other poets are they just need time to heal. You can heal with Todd, he wants to be your friend..." They smiled and I looked down at the floor.

"Todd wants to be my friend? Still?" I whispered loud enough for them to hear me

"He said so himself..."

That day a new chapter of my life opened up, one full of healing and maturing. All thanks to (Y/n), it was as if the universe sent me a fairy godmother or something.

Unfortunately he moved back to Manchester near the end of the school year. But by then my friendship with the Poets was repaired, it won't be the same without them though, the meetings started happening again. He joined in a few of them and was named "official member".

He came to visit Vermont during breaks and we spent day and night together.