Until The Last Star Falls | BTS ✓

23: Live as you

"You can't keep me in the hospital forever, just so you know, I'm your bodyguard."

Where the moon is high in the night sky, you lay in a private VIP room they've gotten you with the younger ones still awake by your sides. You think the older ones have gone to sleep but they're still up, silently listening in on your conversation.

"The doctor says you need proper healing for at least four weeks," Jungkook tells you but you only scowl.

"Back where I lived, things like this doesn't stop us. We keep moving on because that's how things are everyday. No one cares about injuries and whatnot, they only care about surviving."

"You can't walk," Taehyung points out.

"I used to get stabbed here and there but I still—"

"Well this isn't where you used to live anymore, alright?" Jimin stops you with a tone that's more serious than ever. It's his gaze that also makes you pause. "You may be used to fighting and all that but please," he begs, "heal properly so that you can stand by our sides again."

You frown at his words. "I'm not leaving your sides."

"You think we're going to let you protect us like this?"

"I've lived my whole life learning how to fight and protect, Jimin, I don't know what to do if I can't do those things. I don't have friends to hang out with, a family to take care of me. I don't have anyone except for the seven of you whom I take great pride in protecting."

"That's what you're afraid of?" He asks and your brows furrows a little with confusion. "You aren't afraid of getting hurt, of death, but you're afraid of not being able to protect because that's what you're used to your whole life."

Was that it? Because you're so used to putting your life at risk for others, you don't know what else to do if you can't do that.

"I guess that's it," you admit, eyes falling a little before looking back up at him. "Because there's nothing else I'm good at. I can't do normal things that women are capable of. I can't cook, I can't wash, I can barely walk on heels, I've never picked flowers, nor have I ever worn a dress. Rarely do I ever let my hair down because I'm so used to keeping it out of the way in order to fight. I was never raised a lady so how the heck do I go about life if you're restricting me from doing the one thing I know how to do?"

There is a small silence that surpasses the group and Yoongi thinks silently from where he lays.

You sound like that young warrior you spoke of that one time. The one who's so used to putting others needs before hers. The one who was raised a man because her father didn't want his firstborn to be a daughter. A part of him felt as if the story was yours and although many parts of it sounds a bit out of the ordinary, he's sure you share some aspects to the warrior.

A face hidden behind a mask for whatever reasons he knows nothing of.

"You don't have to live as a lady," Taehyung tells you as he takes your hands, stroking it gently and frowning at the way your eyes seems to be the loneliest he's ever seen. "You don't have to live as a man or someone who knows nothing else except for protecting. All you have to do," he pats your head, "is live as Y/N. Just Y/N."

"If it makes you feel better, you can remain by our sides as long as you don't put your life at risk again," Jungkook tells you. "If you see anything wrong, tell someone, stop putting yourself on the line. It's okay to let others do the protecting."

"It's okay to let yourself be protected as well."

Their words warms your heart and although they don't see it, they know you are smiling and it's enough for them.

That night, you let your hair flow down with Taehyung helping you brush through it. The two of you remain awake for a little longer while everyone else falls asleep before soon enough, your head falls from Taehyung's gentle hands running through your hair and that is the last thing you feel before your mind falls into a blissful dream.

Though your time with them shortens, it is progress.

.

.

.

"Wow, wow! I feel so free! I didn't know letting my hair down would have such a better effect on enjoying the cherry blossoms!"

You laugh as you ride on your wheelchair, pushing yourself at a rapid speed and your hair flows with the wind.

"Taehyung! Picture! Picture!" You're quick to turn yourself around to face them while the cherry blossoms stands at each side of you, the path trailing endlessly behind and in front of you.

When Taehyung captures the moment, he can see your smile despite the mask that hides it and he knows, they know, that it is beautiful.

Your laugh tells them so.