Sketches

25. Sun Kissed

Baring

I parked my car in the school parking lot. With surprisingly steady hands I clutched the top of the steering wheel, staring at the school's double doors. The glass metal doors remained shut, separating me from anyone else I knew but most importantly they were my current, last line of defense. I tightened my grip above the steering wheel swallowing all the unnamed emotions that were running rampant in my body.

"Hey," Kol whispered from my passenger seat, "You can skip a day, a lot has happened over the weekend and if you need some time I won't blame you."

Kol was hinting towards the events that had occurred over the weekend. The ‘should have been’ sleepover at Josiah's house. My grand exit has I fled from his house in the dead of the night. And my so-called new found courage that led me to the police station at 6pm on a sunday. Yes, the weekend was an emotional roller coaster. But not only that, but the proceedings at the police station had not gone as planned and the officer who spoke to us told us I would need to come back and tell my story, again within the week. Not only did I have the guilt gnawing at the pit of my stomach but now I had this image of a terrifying Detective looming over my very existence.

"No. It's fine," I said, squeezing the steering wheel even tighter.

The weekend had, suffice to say, knocked the wind out of my sails but what made me dread walking through the school's entrance was none other than Josiah. The downside of finally realising that I might actually be in love with him was realising that I was the reason he was hurting. I was the cause of his anguish and that alone fueled most of my guilt. I hadn't seen Josiah since Friday night and to be honest, I didn't know if I was brave enough to face him. Not after knowing what I knew. Especially not after all the pain I had caused him. He deserved so much better than me and not someone who. . .

Kol placed his hand over mine. The contact from his palms brought me back to reality. Staring at his hand over mine I swallowed my words trying with all my might to erase my emotions from my face. If there was ever a time for a poker face this was it.

"I am here for you. You know that right?" Kol's voice was hardly a whisper and his hand remained firmly secured over  mine. I looked at his hand and back at his face trying to take in his words as much as I could but with all the emotions constantly swirling inside me and the tone of voice Kol used I couldn't find the skill in me. Kol continued, face stoic, "You don't have to do this on your own because I..."

"Baring? Dude! Where have you been?" Casper yelled, bending over to poke his head through my open window. Casper turned his head slightly and yelled at the two figures behind him as they made their way towards us, "Guys! Guess who finally showed up."

I groaned into my palm looking over a smug Kol.  He winked at me and gave Caspian a small bop of the head. His expression had completely changed within a few seconds. He looked more aloof and nonchalant unlike what he had looked like a few seconds ago.

Caspian's smile grew wider and he leaned into the car to yell, "Oh! You were with Lover boy over here."

I groaned willing Caspian to shut up because it was still drop off time. Josiah could hear him and assume the worst not only that Kol and I were just friend no matter how you looked at it. I looked at Kol and he looked even more smug. He was basically radiating smugness from his seat. I groaned, nodding when Jan leaned over Caspian's shoulder to say hi to me. You would think we didn't have the same class with the way they were clamoring over each other. Henri unlike the two rascals in the window stood behind and nodded. I gave him an answering nod as I pushed the two heads out.

"Meet you inside guys."

Caspian and Jan made some kissing noises before high fiving each other for having the same thought. I shook my head and looked away but not before noticing Henri's sullen face. Something was up with him. He looked just as bad as I felt.