Besabriyaan

Chapter 37

'The reality is you don't give a shit about anyone around you, Manik.'

Splash

'Don't be sorry, Manik. I trusted you, my mistake'

Splash

'I wish I could give you my pain...just for a second not because I want to hurt you but so you could feel what I'm going through..just because of you.'

Splash

Splash

'Believe me when I say, you're the brightest star standing before me and now I know when they say this star burns everything around.'

Splash

'Not to sound bitter but I hope hurting me by killing my love haunts you for years.'

Splash

Splash

Splash

I panted holding the sides of the basin as water kept dripping down my chin wetting my tshirt. Looking up at the mirror before, I witnessed a man who couldn't think anymore. My eyes were red either because of such ruthless splashes into my eyes or the fact that smoke burnt my eyes for three consecutive days without a touch of sleep. It was weird because I knew I was mad enough to scream but broke enough to not shed a tear. What have I done? I had no fucking idea that standing for the truth for the first ever time in my life would cost my best friend so damn much.. cost me so damn much. What did I gain out of all the mess I made? Nothing. I lost a friend who was an eternal happiness in my best friend's life.

"Sir, there's someone important awaiting you at your private living room." I sighed sinking my face into the soft towel.

"Cancel all my schedule for today." Like previous three days.

"Sir, he's important." I stared into the blank garden from my window, seeing the sunlight after three whole days letting it peep into room burning my cold skin with its heat. I knew my staff was awaiting my response but I still was unsure if I yet wanted to step out of my damp room and mingle with people.

"Is the press still outside?" My voice was hoarse whilst my sleep deprived eyes kept scanning the colourful dandelions swinging in the early morning breeze.

"The guards along with the police security are having a hard time keeping them on the other side of the gate." He informed and I stood facing the window, expressionless.

How the fuck was I ever going to get over the truth that I killed the love of my best friend's life! Was there a drug that could make me forget and ease the throbbing pain in my chest forever? Honestly, when I ran to the hospital the very next morning getting sober fighting the mob of cameras and microphones, Cabir's eyes filled with hatred or his words coupled with disgust as he pushed me against the wall making me stumble on my feet didn't hurt me anyhow but the look on his face when he mentioned about Mukti's death and that he was never going to be again with her because of me...killed me in ways a human can't be slaughtered.

"Tell him, I'm coming." I murmured as this took a lot of energy to be spoken.

Letting a black silken robe hang untied on my body over my black tank t-shirt and trouser, I stepped out of the room mentally unprepared. Oh, so unprepared. I wasn't thinking who it was going to be or what I was going to say had it been someone I refuse to talk or what if someone reminded what a betrayal I had thrown towards my friend. I wasn't prepared for facing any such. Maybe, I could hide. Hide from all this. Maybe, I could lose myself in the hands of this overpowering pain and never seek for an antidote. Maybe, I could. Maybe, I couldn't.